I’ve hit a wall. This happens from time to time. I usually can read around five books in a row before I start to feel booklag. I’m at that point now. I’m reading Commonwealth by Ann Patchett, which is good so far, but I just cannot bring myself to actually read it. It is by no means because of the content. Like I said, it’s good. I just have no motivation to read.
The problem is I’m not doing anything else incredibly rewarding right now. I’m out of school, still looking for a job, and have no real big projects going on. I’m leading an unproductive life for the time being. In times like this, I often have a hard time picking up a book. To me, reading is a reward at the end of a long day, an escape from the real world. But when my days aren’t long, and when I haven’t interacted with the real world, reading doesn’t feel right. It feels like a waste of time. Typing that hurt me a little, but I want to be honest. When I’m reading with nothing else to do, with nothing to take a break from, I don’t feel like I’ve earned it. If I was working, something I so badly want to be doing, I don’t think I’d have as hard of a time picking up a book and reading for hours. As it is now, I can hardly read for twenty minutes without getting antsy.
I think I’ve applied to about fifteen jobs, and only two have gotten back to me. All they said, though, was that they weren’t hiring. That’s so irritating. Why have a posting if you don’t have any jobs open? If you really just didn’t want me, just say so, I’m an adult. I can handle it. Don’t ghost me. That happens enough in my personal life; I don’t need it bleeding into my professional life.
I’m sure that in a little while I’ll get back on my reading train. It’s just hard right now. If only magic were real, and I could Apparate anywhere I wanted in the world. How lovely that would be.
Let me know what you do to get out of a reading slump. I’d love some tips. Waiting around for a job doesn’t seem to be workin’ out so well.